And we are here for some reason

knowing or not knowing (how can you know?) doesn’t change that you are.

And do not tremble because you are uncertain, instead, push forward feeling like that 100%.

Fake it till you make it, someone said it, but the vain brain is such that what you believe will become true to some extent.

I had not meant to, but in choosing to meet their eyes I was somehow staring them down.

Perhaps I had meant it, well, either way, it was done and she was confident in part thanks to that. People’s emotions are rarely just their own and you are accountable and responsible for many of the emotions of the people around you.

They have a smile full of innocence but is it my brain then tricking me, or them tricking me into only seeing the sweetness of the young?

Does it have to be a trick? Regardless, because of that perception I cannot change how I view them, it is fixed in that frame, of a duty of care. A duty to be patient and to refrain from unkindness that we know we are so capable of.

We have come so far, still, why is there such a distance for these stars to cross?

When will they align? Do we really need such a divine blessing?

It’s funny.

We trust the light in their eyes more than the light in ours, when we know ourselves better than we know others. So what are we to make of that? That we are honest or hopelessly optimistic – the character lines up not with the person and evidence laid before us, but why not?

People are not two-dimensional figures of either goodness or evil.

We listened to a speaker who believed in the Baha’i faith last week, and he was telling us how evil was the absence of good.

If people are a mixture, then what happens to the world?

He said that people are plenty evil enough for us to be scared of the world, there was no need to even imagine that there were evil spirits in this plane of existence.

He is right in that, at least, though I’m not sure I would readily subscribe.

The hint of not-good that we saw, was that characteristic or the anomaly, why are our glasses so faulty?

We are far less forgiving of others, especially those we see often. Maybe now that we see them less often, we are more so?

An odd consideration, yes, familiarity seems to breed sickness. But absence, if not felt, causes all feeling to evaporate.

If we do not miss them, in another month I will return here and the truth would be that they did not factor in at all. A disappointing realisation.

Should we be disappointed? If so, would it be in ourself?

The portion that thinks and the portion that feels, and then the ‘us’ concept that acts, parts of a truthfully disjointed whole, moral explanations follow like a shadow of action, the kneejerk reaction that cannot be explained by anything but instinct.

Why does that instinct work that way then?

There should be no mistake that a tool honed by evolution is useful. But why does it work the way it does?

How a tool turns out, the same instinct that drives the brain which tells us to be a little more cautious.

How a person turns out, the lesson becoming the basis upon which the student builds caution.

How a person turns out, the friend becoming the understanding on which we decide that friends like that are good or not good, meant or not meant to be kept.

Odd.

The weather is cold and I feel old.

I’m not quite sold on the bold claim that all will be fine.

I will not fold my cards quite yet either,

so much more has yet to be told.

A story I want to hear, one I am owed.

Still, the people I watch for that reason may never confess,

as long as it holds a possibility yes, why not?

You need not be told for you to see, though what is it that we are looking for?

Where the lines intersected and the formation was completed,

I asked something important, and I got a half-answer.

Not a disqualifier but why is it a race, anyway?

It is not, so that doesn’t matter.

What does this future hold? Are you in want for some gold?

Then silence is all I can give, leave that mould.

 

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